me: instantly jumps to worst possible conclusion

teenjuwel:

This discribes my cooking skills perfectly.

urbanclictionary:

doin a group project likeimage

unclefather:

how to kiss a boy

  1. grab his waist
  2. slip your hand in his pocket
  3. steal his wallet
  4. dont even kiss him
  5. just run

typically-unique:

I want to be one of those people who does yoga and eats berries for breakfast, but I’m one of those people who stays in bed until 4 pm and eats pizza. 

*gets down on one knee* will you please give me the wifi password?

oknope:

do you ever think how bitchy and annoying you really are and wonder how anyone ever tolerates you

cooldadgang:

ripping out someone one’s headphones is the 8th deadly sin